I See Drab People

 I had to share the following written by one of my seven brothers……. He makes me Laugh!
 
By: Ed from Vancouver
 
For a period of time last year, I considered bringing in a professional laundry consultant to propose a solution to my troubles; dull whites and drab colours.  I spent hours, perhaps days fretting over the hardness of the water and the type of detergent I should use.  Did I need bleach and if so, what bleach would perform the best?  Dry or liquid?  Was I destroying the environment in my quest for whiter whites and more colourful colours.  My clothes appeared as though I had purchased them around the time of Woodstock, and it wasn’t just this thing I have for tie-dyes and bell bottoms.  My clothes had that well worn appearance.  Before long, I developed a habit of throwing out and replacing every item of clothing on the first day of each month.  It was costing a fortune, but I had to have clothes that not only were new, but looked as though I just bought them at my neighbourhood Walmart.  Nothing worked.  I even began buying things from the Shopping Channel.  For just $19.95, (plus shipping and handling), every item of clothing in my wardrobe would be revived and look new, if I just sprayed them with; ‘Miracle Renew’, or, my money back; guaranteed (less shipping and handling).
Then December 19th came and who could believe that everything would be changed.  The galaxy would spin through space just like it was supposed to.  My whites became white and my colours, more colourful.  
I got a new lens in my left eye and all was well in my world; white, blue, green, gold, red and yellow tie-dyed t-shirts and bell bottoms were bright and new again.
 
Ed